Daily Archives: October 23, 2008

Hulk #7 (2008) – The Review

Hulk #7

Hulk #7

Spoilers below!  Look out!  I have to be honest – I don’t even feel like giving my review.  I want to stop bashing the character I love.  It’s gotten to the point where I dread even turning the cover page.  But here’s what you find when you do read the… comic:

We begin in Vegas.  Bruce explains, in narration, that the Red Hulk (ugh) has killed a Wendigo.  Everything that the Red Hulk does just gets blamed on him because he’s the original.  All the bad stuff that the Red Hulk does is all blamed on Bruce.  Well, the Wendigo – a mythical creature bound to the Canadian wilderness – has somehow left Canada and is seeking out the Hulk for revenge.  (Loeb calls them hybrids)  So, some douche parks like an idiot, almost hitting Bruce, at a casino where Wendigo’s have been killing people inside.  Bruce enters and becomes… the Grey Hulk.  Oh good, another transformation Loeb doesn’t explain.  The Hulk could never just slip into different personalities without reason until lazy writers started to write the Hulk.  Here is no exception.  What the hell Loeb?  What made him become the grey Hulk – let alone call himself Joe Fixit?  And what made him Fixit?  The fact that he’s in Vegas?  Dude, Fixit was fired… he didn’t call himself Fixit as his personality – he called himself Fixit because he didn’t want people to know the Hulk was still alive.  Anyways, the Wendigo fight the Hulk who is having a ball fighting them off.  Suddenly the Hulk is attacked by Moon Knight.  Hulk is helping people and gets attacked by one of the heroes – sound familiar? – and Hulk easily turns his attention to beating the crap out of Moon Knight until – again – he looks behind him and sees that Marvel Girl and Sentry has also come to stop him.  Then the comic let’s you know that the next issue will feature the Green Hulk again…

Now, is where I get really angry.  Because they have split the Hulk comic into two mini-stories.  So instead of getting one longer crappy story we get two crappy stories that lasts what seems like 5 pages long.  Anyways, She Hulk is recruiting female heroes to take on the Red Hulk.  She calls everyone and calls them by their real names but, Bummer!, they are all busy.  She does recruit Valkyrie and Thundra and then the 3 of them sit in a confrence and learn that the Green Hulk, Iron Man and Thor were all beaten by the Hulk.  No one mentions the fact that the 3 girls sitting there couldn’t hold a candle to any of those heroes so how the hell are they going to fight the Red Hulk.  The ladies just get get into new costumes and head out to fight.  They find the Red Hulk pretty quickly and the fight doesn’t last very long – Red makes quick work of them and then starts hitting on Valkyrie and Thundra.

So here’s my review… I have come to realize that I must have done something really bad in a former life – that’s why my favorite comic is now a sham and a horrible sham at that.  F

Frank Cho Variant
Frank Cho Variant
*QUICK NOTE: The guy at my LCS said that the Turner variants were incentive covers.  Like, if you order so many comics than they give you these covers.  Turns out though the deal was ridiculous.  They wanted stores to buy a crazy amount that most stores refused to do it.  This, by the way, is second hand information and in no way garunteed accurate.  But it sounded good to me so I report it to you 🙂 if you know any other information about the variants please feel free to comment!